The Secret, Unsuspected Sanctum Sancyouverymuch of Doctor Deranged Cosmic Trusts-Mystic Might-Lottery Tickets
Story Peter B. Gillis
Art Phil Foglio
Letters Jim Novak
Colors Bob Sharen
Editor Carl Pottts
Two Doors Down and to the Right Tom DeFalco
Now this entire issue is a huge step up from the first one!
Story opens with Doctor Strange being harassed by the Marvel magical characters, including Magik. Magik is upset as her demon is in black and white, which of course is Cerebus, by Dave Sim. Which is a take off of how S’ym was her main demon henchman and he was a tall pink demon. Its all connected!
This entire issue finally explains that if they are going to harpoon and parody other company’s characters, they have to the same with their own characters.
Doctor Strange teleports himself to the crossroads of between comic companies.
A sexy brunette with a white half shirt and fishnet stockings seduces Doctor Strange. He follows her. He steps first through a door and with that, he is stuck in the DC Universe! Zantanna covers just enough of the log that maybe it is the BC universe? She dons her proper outfit,
Up first, Doctor Strange meets the Stranger.
Next, Doctor Fate. Good thing Access and Professor Xavier were not around or we could have gotten Doctor Strangefate! One of the few Amalgam titles I kept, as it is one of the few comics that Access has appeared in.
Then, Deadman shows up.
The Spectre doesn’t care for this intruder here in the Distinguished Competition. Before he can get rid of Strange, the Anti-Monitor also appears.
This new universe is too silly for Doctor Strange and he just leaves. Unfortunately, he arrives in Pittsburgh right at the moment the New Universe is created. uh oh
Other stories in the issue are :
Superbman vs Fantastical Four written and with art by John Byrne. I’m sure the Inevitable Woman has never looked so good. Byrne also, of course, draws an awesome Superman.
Knick Furey in retirement
Wolverine with the X-Men, I like how the silly parody names from the previous issue are used again here. Sort of this the universe What The exists in a feel that it is all connected within it. Plus, I can only imagine how difficult and maddening it would be to keep coming up with different ways to spell their names.
The Doctor Strange story is the last of the four stories.
This series has to be the hardest title to Google that Marvel has released!
So Magneto is having the X-Men and New Mutants train together. They all have silly versions of their names, for copyright reasons, I guess?
Cannonball – Sam’in’ball
Dazzler – Fizzler
Wolfsbane – Wolfstain
Wolverine – Wulvoream
Ororo – Ororororo
Piotr – Pewter
Sunspot – Some-Spots
Rogue – Vogue
It isn’t great. Luckily, Magik doesn’t have to suffer with any of that.
Doug, Sigh-for, is nervous as he has no place on the team with his powerset. Magma, Smegma, yells about his thought balloon being too repetitive, which is funny.
There is a quick conversation about how to pronounce, Magneto. Mag-neat-toe, is how I do it.
British Psylocke, Bipsycle-locke, detects a message from the Offengers (Avengers) that they have been taken over by the Puppet Mister and the X-Men have to stop them.
The Avengers are – Doctor Druid, Captain America, Wasp, Captain Marvel, Black Knight, She-Hulk and Namor.
Not sure why the artist gave Magik vampire teeth (I guess because she is lord of all demons?) but at least she got her soulsword.
So all the heroes fight. The Fantastic Four shows up. They are Thing, Human Torch, Ms. Marvel (not Carol) and Crystal.
Then the West Coast Avengers (Guest Host Offengers) show up – Iron Man, Wonder Man (Wonderbread), Tigra, Mockingbird, Moon Knight (who moons them – something the character would never do!) and Hawkeye (Hawk guy) shows up.
Even X-Factor and Alpha Flight show up. Then everyone else does too! Hulk, Spider-Man, Thor, Daredevil even.
The Beyonder asks if this is part of Secret Wars III and they all stop what they are doing and tell him to leave.
Captain America tries to get them all to use their words instead of their fists and he gets punched and elbowed by Wolverine and Spider-Man for his thanks.
Story ends with the artist having an heart attack and the moral of the story is – Team Books Kill.
The art is goofy but so is the story. Its fun and light and the names can be ridiculous but it adds to the story.
The other stories in the comic involve –
Punisher
Bower Brats Meet Clunk and Dagnabbit
This one
Secret Wars III
I did buy the second issue at MileHighComics.com as part of my Father’s Day comics present, so I should be reviewing that one soon. I already own issues three and four but that’s it for me and this 26 issue series.
Magik was an original member of the team, thus, I own most of them until she left. Doug joins later during Necrosha.
The storylines and tie-ins this title had were :
Return of Legion
Necrosha
Siege
Second Coming
Fall of the New Mutants
Rise of the New Mutants
Age of X
Unfinished Business
Fear Itself
Exiled
Fear the Future
Fight the Future
The creative team for the series have been :
1, 2, 3, 4 – Zeb Wells and Diogenes Neves
5 – Zeb Wells and Zachary Baldus6, 7, 8 – Zeb Wells and Diogenes Neves
9, 10 – Zeb Wells and Paul Davidson
11 – Kieron Gillen and Niko Henrichon
12, 13, 14 – Zeb Wells and Ibraim Roberson
15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21 – Zeb Wells and Leonard Kirk
22, 23, 24 – Mike Carey and Steve Kurth
25, 26, 27 – Dan Abnett & Andy Lanning and Leandro Fernandez
28 -Dan Abnett & Andy Lanning and Michael Ryan
29, 30, 31, 32 – Dan Abnett & Andy Lanning and David Lafuente
33, 34, 35, 36, 37 – Dan Abnett & Andy Lanning and David Lopez
38, 39, 40 – Dan Abnett & Andy Lanning and Leandro Fernandez
41 – Dan Abnett & Andy Lanning and David Lopez
42, 43 – Dan Abnett & Andy Lanning with Kieron Gillen and Carmine Di Giandomenico
44, 45, 46 – Dan Abnett & Andy Lanning and Leandro Fernandez
47, 48, 49, 50 – Dan Abnett & Andy Lanning and Felix Ruiz with Klebs
Pretty cool how they kept getting artists back to the title, it really does add synergy.
I have 13 issues on my wishlist, most of them are Variant covers –
1 – Ross, Benjamin, McLeod, 2nd Printing
4 – 70th Anniversary Frame Variant
6 – Zombie Variant
10 – Deadpool Variant
13 – Heroic Age Variant
15 – Art Adams Variant17 – Regular Cover (I own the Variant) Magik is on the regular cover, so that’s why I still want it
24 – Regular Cover
25 – Art Adams Variant
37 – Regular Cover
So I really just want 24 and 37 as I’ve already read issue 17. But it would be nice to knock off some of these variants one day.
I really like this handbook – it is one of those ones that isn’t just a picture of a character and a summary of who they are. It is done in a very clever way. It feels like we are looking through the character’s eyes at his desk and what he is seeing.
The jist of this issue is that Ian McNee, a sorcerer, has this Tarot Deck that was given to him by Doctor Strange. He has had it for a decade and now he is noticing that magic is falling apart.
This issue serves as a jumping on point for the Mystic Arcana series of one shots. I own only a few of them. This one, the Magik issue and the proper Handbook.
There is this cool opening page of the four elements and Magik represents air.
Black Knight is Earth. Scarlet Witch is Water. Sister Grimm is Fire.
Magik’s Limbo and the Winding Way are referenced as The Archipelago of Anguish and Redemption.
This poor stylish Handbook regarding magic in the Marvel Universe, had to make a reference to the Superhero Civil War. For shame
The Winding Way gets its own page. On it, Amanda Selfton, her mother and Nightcrawler are referenced. Amanda’s time as Magik is mentioned, as well as, that her tenure in the role may be coming to an end. Which it really is.
Then on page 31, we see that Magik is the face on the Justice card. Except for when it is Valkeryie, both characters were dead at the time, so is unsettling.
Here is the collection of the Tarot cards that has Magik on it. There is some simply amazing art in this.
The rest of the issue is pretty interesting as well. I am not much of a magic type of reader but even trying to skim the issue just for Magik references, there is a lot of time and effort that went into designing this issue and researching it as well.
On June 21, Ian McNee first notices the Tarot cards are broken.
On July 7, 2007 – he starts doing the research into the cards and keeping track of it in his journal.
By this point, I had stopped buying New Mutants as Magik had graduated to the big league and was a member of Cyclops’ Extinction Team. I had heard this was a great crossover, with it winning the Best Crossover Award over at the Comic Book Resources X-Books forum.
This was at the time when the Asgardians were living in Broxton, Oklahoma. I’m not sure why they are there, I vaguely remember it was due to that being where they were reborn after Ragnarok. My only interaction with it was during the Siege crossover as that is where the bulk of the story takes place.
The cast of characters are :
Journey into Mystery – Loki / Thor / Hela / Tyr / Leah / Fandral / Volstagg / Hogun
New Mutants – Warlock / Sunspot / Magma / Cypher / Dani / X-Man
The recap page is done by a young boy who is doing it as if it was a board game, which makes sense in the middle of the comic when we see him again. This is the only part of the crossover that I own (or will own) so any unanswered questions are just going to have to be that. Though it does a decent job of exposing the world.
This issue opens with the New Mutants, in San Francisco, and some people have disappeared, as Dani says. Doug corrects her, a running theme of the issue, that when gods disappear – they are banished. oh Doug, learn to read a room!
Dani wants to call the Broxton police as they will know who to contact in the Asgardian community to let them know that Aesir and Disir are either dead or banished.
Dani’s next step, and the reason why I bought this, is to go to Utopia and get Magik. Magik can trace the energy signature and be able to send the team after the trail. Sunspot pipes up stating that she is their resident magical guru.
Just then, they are home again and eating Doug’s muffins. They are acting as if that’s what they have been doing this entire time. Actually, the muffins are from next door but Doug is going to use his power as food is a language and he can get the receipe via eating it. I’m not sure if that is how his power can actually do, I know it is in a comic and he said it but from what I’ve read Abnett & Lanning, collectively known as DnA (their first names – though I do wonder if Lanning ever doesn’t care for it as it is essentially just Abnett’s initials), they really pushed Doug’s power to some high limits.
Dani also questions if that is how his powers works, which may be a meta message as Gillen might be questioning his partner writers in Doug’s powers.
X-Man walks into the room and slaps the muffin out of Dani’s hands (he’s a jerk!) and he explains how today is Saturday and the last thing everyone should remember is that it was only Friday night mere seconds ago. Doug pipes up that he can also see that time has been rewritten.
Dani starts speaking aloud, about how Sigurd had unrolled a piece of paper. To which Doug corrects her that it is called, a scroll. Oh Doug, if you ever had a chance with Dani – you are losing it!
The doorbell rings and there is a blonde mechanic outside, apologizing for the delay in fixing their vehicle. He’s speaking with the Asgardian font – which get use to it as once we leave the team, everyone talks in that font.
The mechanic had to repair the church and so that caused the delay in their car repair so he knock a few hundred dollars off. The church is where a woman support group meets, which that group gets mention later in the issue as well.
Magma is given the keys to the car, as they are mesmerized by the mechanic. He is force to comment on how they are just staring at the poor guy. He leaves as he is given no response.
Once he is gone, Sunspot shouts that was Thor and they all run after the mechanic. The mechanic has made it to his garage, so the New Mutants must have been staring off at him for quite some time.
I’m being confused by the setting of the story, are they in San Francisco or are they in Braxton with the Asgardians? Or is there a weird divide and they can be in two locations at the same time? I’m sure those types of answers were established in the first story.
So the New Mutants confront the mechanic, he laughs at being called, Thor. He is a blonde mechanic with a giant hammer, he gets a lot. He also makes a reference to the awesome Elizabeth Shue film, Adventures in Babysitting.
Thanks to YouTuber geligniteandallies for hosting the video!
Yes, that is Vincent D’Onofrio! He’s going to be the Kingpin in the Netflix Daredevil series.
I still wonder what made the scriptwriter, David Simkins, write Thor into the script. So funny now, back in 1987, Marvel would have let anyone use their characters (hence the reason why FOX owns X-Men and Fantastic Four and Sony has Spider-Man) but Disney made Adventures in Babysitting (via Touchstone Pictures) and now they own Marvel, so they can have Thor be in all of their films. If only!
Speaking of Thor, I like the character, I just have some caveats. I like him on Earth, for the most part. I get he’s an Asgardian but I have no real interest in the day to day of that. I mostly like him in team environments or when he is surrounded by other known characters, like in a crossover event. The only time I ever bought his solo ongoing was after Heroes Return when Dan Jurgens (of Superman fame) and John Romita Jr. was on art. That was such a great series! Plenty of guest stars and they did do Asgard but they made it interesting.
Anyway, what I’m getting at is that I really like Adventures in Babysitting and I’m surprised it took this long to make a reference to it in Thor related comic. Unless it happens more than I know but I doubt it.
So the Asgardians (who I’m not sure know that they are Asgardians or if they fake it in case people are ease dropping) dress in everyday clothes and have regular jobs. Fandral enters the garage and speaks with Thor about the mistaken identity. Fandral’s name is Andy and Thor’s is Arthur (get it?)
In another house, young children named, Luke and Leia (yep) are in their house alone. Luke is playing a board game of strategy and Leia is tired of him playing with himself (the comic makes the joke!). I get the impression that Luke is the one who is behind all of the mysterious goings on.
Leia gets bored of him and goes into their mother’s recycling truck as she just showed up. Helen shouts, bring out your dead (so she must be Hela) and Leia comments on how that makes everyone around them uncomfortable.
Luke apparently was dragged along on this quest. He goes into a bakery as he wants some glazed doughnuts. We see that Volstagg is the baker and that he has eaten all the glazed doughnuts as his face, belly and hands are covered in glaze.
A blonde lady enters the bakery (this must be the same baker that Doug was talking about) looking for the gluten-free, unseeded, non-dairy, unsugared, unleavened buns. Volstagg, of course, hasn’t eaten those and thus, the buns are available. She is buying them for the support group.
There is a cute moment when the blonde lady says that Volstagg looks delicious and he asks her to repeat it and she says the buns look delicious.
Luke leaves disappointed and gets chased by a dog.
Tiffany offers Luke to join her self-defense class and he turns her down. Another man states that he is happy with that decision as Luke is already a handful.
Luke runs into the New Mutants. Apparently, he is a fan of them. He is glad that he ran into them as he was thinking of stalking them. He likes that they are hated and feared and wonders if that means they get better service now. Poor Luke is hated but he’s not feared.
Luke goes on to comment about how he is half mutant and sent in an application to the Jean Grey School. Then he doesn’t know if that is insulting or not, and asks them which side (of the Schism) are they on.
Dani tries to put a stop to this one sided conversation but Luke keeps going on about how he was Wolverine for Halloween.
Dani finally breaks in and says that he is Loki. Which didn’t even dawn on me. Maybe because I’ve been saying it to myself as Luke in the traditional sense but sometimes the caption boxes call him “Luc” like “Look” which would make more sense.
Luke / Loki states that she has the wrong guy. So in the previous issue, is when Loki become Kid Loki – and started on his path of capturing the hearts and minds of comic fans. Dani is a Valkyrie and can see Kid Loki for who he really is. She tries to remind him about Sigurd and what happened the previous night.
Doug announces that he is the trickster of Asgard and no spell can hold him back. Poor Kid Loki goes into a spasm.
Magma gets bad at Doug, he was only trying to do what Magik would have done in this situation.
Kid Loki now remembers who he rightfully is. He wants a helmet to fell complete again.
Dani wants answers, Kid Loki tells them that they need to all go to Sigurd’s abode and search for clues – just like they do on television.
At Sigurd’s place. Doug has found some armor. Sunspot found a bunch of take-out food. Kid Loki arrives in a Grant Morrison styled X-Uniform. which is way to big for him.
Sigurd shows up, he’s hungry. Dani starts asking a slew of questions. She wants to know what happened to the Disir. Whenever Sigurd says the name, it is written D-i-s-i-r, I have no idea the significance of that.
Apparently the Disir eat Asgardians, so they are the woman who are starving themselves. So he cast a spell that made all Asgardians forget who they are. Magma states that there were good Asgardians who now don’t know who they are. Sigurd’s only response is that that is a shame. Dani’s comeback of, you took out one of the greatest heroes in history and all you can say for yourself is that it is a shame. That’s a funny line!
Sigurd isn’t a magician, he bought the spell so the dealer should have a counter-spell.
Kid Loki needs some time to come up with a counter-spell.
Sigurd starts hitting on Dani, she is the hot one of the group, even with Magma standing right there. Oh, the irony!
In an alley, a dog is barking at a cat. The blonde from the bakery picks up the cat and devours it. So the Disir are cats, I guess? Now the starving women have something to eat, they should all be happy!
That’s how the issue ends, seems like it should be a pretty good story but I’m out of it.
If you are like me, you may not know much about Doctor Voodoo. Here is what the caption states :
He has many names. Lord of the Loa. He-Who-Has-Died-Twice. Houngan Supreme. Now the Eye of Agamotto has chosen Jericho Drumm to protect the Earth from the forces of darkness, and given him his greatest title : Sorcerer Supreme. He is … Doctor Voodoo, Avenger of the Supernatural.
I own this issue and issue five is on my wishlist. I was going to scan the Magik appearances in the issue, but she’s on nearly every other page and I want to keep scans to when I bought a comic just for one page or two pages. I’m also not sure what the rule is about just pasting pages upon pages from a comic, so I try to limit myself to two to three, max. As a typical rule. Though I see Bendis over at his Tumblr, posting half of comics before – but he’s Bendis, so I imagine its okay when he does it.
Inside front cover is an ad for Ultimate X, I own the first issue, that was pretty good.
In the previous issues, Nightmare is slowly taking over Earth. The last place on Earth that is safe is Latveria. Doctor Doom and Doctor Voodoo are trying to correct that.
I still wish that Bendis in the New Avengers arc that determined who would be Doctor Strange’s replacement (as he was hurt and needed to recover) had chosen Magik but Bendis does love him some 70s heroes so it makes sense he would go with Brother Voodoo. Shame that only four years later, Voodoo is missing again from monthly titles. This was in New Avengers 51 through 54, Search for the Sorcerer Supreme. I don’t own issue 52 but the other three, Magik does show up in. We will get around to reviewing those eventually.
So Nightmare has taken over most of the magic based heroes, including Magik. They are searching for Doctor Voodoo, actually they are searching for the Orb of Agamotto and the Book of Vishanti, but Voodoo knows where they are. If they knew it was with Doom, they would probably just let it go.
We get a nice flashback to Voodoo’s origins, his family didn’t like how he was more modern than they were with their beliefs. We learn that his brother is a spirit and is trying to help Voodoo save the day, as well.
The Hounfour – Nightmare’s base. Magik is telling Nightmare about what they have learn, they know they have to go to Doom. Heroes are living their worst nightmares. Punisher is being haunted by his family. Hulk’s father is berating him. Cyclops is being tormented by both Jean and Emma.
Doctor Voodoo’s plan is to get Nightmare to come to Loa, where the gods of Voodoo live (from what I can tell). Once Nightmare gets there, he will be a physical opponent and can be defeated.
Nightmare and his army of heroes get to Latveria and Doctors Doom and Voodoo (though Voodoo is not a doctor, as far as I can tell) are ready for them!
For this issue and the previous three, they have been publishing the origin of Doctor Voodoo, I checked comicbookdb but it doesn’t state what section of a comic this is. I can confirm it isn’t his first appearance, Strange Tales 169 as the creative team is all wrong.
By this point in the title, I have dropped the title and missed this issue originally. I also skipped Fear Itself, except for the Uncanny X-Men tie in issues.
I had bought this issue before my birthday and meant to include it in that event but it was too close to the 31 of January so I threw it in the back of my back issues and now here we are.
The New Mutants finally make it to Hel, after a detour in actual Hell, which was Doug’s fault due to his bad translation. So now Magma owes Mephisto a date.
The New Mutants are at this point – Dani, Cypher, Warlock, Magma, Sunspot and X-Man Nate Grey, in an unofficial capacity.
The team gets to Helheim, Hela’s palace. Fear Itself was about ancient Norse evils coming to Earth, so it makes sense that the New Mutants’ tie in would involve Hela as she made Dani a Valkyrie back during the Dark Avengers vs. Uncanny X-Men event that lead to the Utopia era. Now Dani owes Hela a favor.
Before this issue, I own issue 30 and after this issue is 45 so I’m piecing things together as my memory of the then current comics and what this issue provides.
Hela is dead, being run through and place on a spike on the roof.
Lafuente and Rodriguez trade off on different pages and scenes for the issue. The colorists also trade off on pages but they don’t sync up with the particular artists. Makes for a kinetic issue.
The New Mutants and X-Man are getting ready to stand their ground, as this might be it. The oncoming storm of dead Norse characters are on their way to finish the job.
Doug tells Magma that he can translate weather now, as it is all sound and that’s his gig. The storm is angry and reveals names to Doug. Threadcutter, Breathraker, Hearthbreaker, Bloodletter, Bonegrinder these make up the Dramaur, who will kill the team if they have their way.
Like the main threat in Fear Itself, Odin has dealt with them previously and have erased them from myth. Which really plays into the legends aspect of memory, if you are a legend but no one remembers you, are you really a legend?
Doug had one shot to send them to Hel correctly and with time, but do to his mistake, they lost time and he is upset with himself. Magma tries to sooth him. From what I recall, the date is pretty funny and Mephisto shows her a good time. I’m sure it has also been forgotten about as I can’t imagine the X-Office would want Magma to keep a relationship going with the devil himself. Though he is a better match for her than Empath will ever be.
This issue does have some nice matchups with characters that wouldn’t normally be paired together.
Sunspot and Nate are at a different section of the palace, on lookout. Sunspot wonders if Nate regrets coming along with them. Nate states that he didn’t hesitate at all, he just jumped in. He isn’t even part of the team. Which I like how that works out. Their first mission under Abnett & Lanning’s tenure was to rescue X-Man and so they did, from Sugar Man. Nate is nowhere near as powerful as he use to be, he barely has his telekinesis powers. Just because you get rescued and then the team starts another adventure, doesn’t necessarily mean that you are part of the team. They just haven’t shaken you off yet.
After editorial wouldn’t pull the trigger on a Dani / Cannonball relationship, they did try with Nate and Dani but I don’t believe that lasted outside of a kiss here and there, if that. Not every female character needs to be weighted down by a dude.
Nate is bemoaning the fact that his powers are at an all time low. Bobby picks up a piece of hail (it is snowing in Hel, that’s not good) and tells him a piece of advice that Xavier gave him. Concentrate on a small spot, really focus on it and grow your powers from there. Bobby refers to this time as when he was a New Mutant, which still bugs me, they don’t refer to their team as New Mutants do they? It doesn’t make any sense. But do any of the actual teams call themselves by the name on their comic cover? I believe Wolverine’s X-Force did and X-Factor did but Wolverine and the X-Men are called the Jean Grey School. Cyclops’ doesn’t call his team the Uncanny X-Men nor does Kitty call her team the All New X-Men, they only refer to themselves as X-Men, which isn’t really marketable.
Before Nate and ask all of these questions, how neat would that had been? Warlock shouts at them that the Draumar are coming!
They start attacking the palace en mass. Magma blocks some debris from hitting Doug. Warlock doesn’t like their chances as they are not prepared prepared for this, to which Bobby swears at him. I like seeing Warlock with any other character besides Doug, as we know their relationship but not really how he gets along with the other members.
Dani is watching over Hela’s body. A crow keeps trying to peck at Hela’s body, which disgusts Dani. Dani is complaining to Hela that they have no defenses here and could really use some help, as she keeps swatting the bird away. The crow eventually works its way into Hela’s mouth, which really disgusts Dani.
Hela starts coughing and explains the situation. She put her mind into the crow as she knew this was the best course for her survival. Hela makes a joke about it being “foul tasting.” Dani is shock that Hela wasn’t dead. Hela is the queen of the dead, how can she be forced to live by mortal-realm concepts? Hela, once she put her soul into the bird, brought the New Mutants here to safeguard her until the time was right. Dani can’t believe Hela trusted her with her soul. By bringing them there, I mean, she sent a message and Doug, whose power is to translate, didn’t translate it correctly. If he knew it was from Hela, that would have been a nice shortcut.
Hela explains who the Draumar are, they are the spirits killed by Odin, and now have been merged into these giant monsters, and what is keeping them together is the energy of serpent. If successful, they will break out of Hel and then go to Midgard (Earth).
Hela doesn’t know how to defeat them, Dani asks if she can do anything and Hela states she can slow them down, with a smirk. I like this fun Hela, there is no reason why she shouldn’t be. She’s the mother of Loki, and that guy has a bunch of fun.
The New Mutants are then cloaked with Asgardian armor. Which makes Magma look like Magik.
The team closes ranks. Warlock makes a Conan reference, crush your enemy and hear the lamentation of his women, which is a great line. Maybe the best line. Dani catches up to the team, and they are united for the first time this issue.
Bobby jokes that Magma has a date with the devil and she comments that the date will be light compared to this fight. Doug likes having Asgardian vigor. Doug also comments on that this is only a delay tactic. Dani calls him a pessimist and he counters with that he is a realist. Nice to see those two interacting as well, for the same reasons.
Nate has taken Bobby’s advice and is blasting the warrior monsters with energy.
Warlock starts smacking some of the warriors with his limbs. This frightens the Draumar, as they don’t understand his advance technology. Seizing on this new found weakness of fear, Nate has Hela reveal his memories to the warriors. Before she does it, Nate confirms that she is the Goddess of Death. Which her response is awesome “Depending on your belief system I am a specific cultural aspect of” and Nate is okay with that being an affirmative.
So Hela does open his memories to the warriors and we get a pretty nice page of the X-Men of the Age of Apocalypse. Except that the dirt-bag-killing-his-wife-Kitty-Pryde Colossus is there (an action figure never coming to you) so that ruins it, even if he is a very tiny part on the page, he’s still there.
Now this really frightens them. Doug explains that the Draumar are ancient and have not kept up with modern times so they have no frame of reference for any of the images they are seeing. Now they fear these new visions and that starts unbinding them. Thus, the day is finally saved.
Hela is quick to point out that this encounter is over but the bigger fight is still raging on on the surface. But its a decent tie in, a problem that was unique to this title and I’m sure didn’t play any role in the larger Fear Itself crossover.
Hela tells them to go home, as their role is done. Hela needs to go be on Asgard’s side in the conflict. Magma states “don’t mention it” and Hela is quick to state, I won’t.
Danni states, and she didn’t as they are back on Utopia in the X-Brig as they have been telling this story for a third party.
That third party? Is Magik, and the issue ends with her asking, how was Hell? I bought this issue for this one page.
I could have wrote, New Mutants go to Hel, come back and tell Magik what was up. But would that have counted as a post? Maybe not a good one.
So Schism happens after this issue as issue 33 has the Regenesis branding and Magik isn’t shown being told that story.
David and Ruth are on their third date. He has taken her to a diner. For once, she is out of her X-Men uniform. She is wearing a pretty cool brown jacket.
Ruth asks if he has any other Ms in mind, as he already has done – mysterious midnight meeting, movie and milkshakes.
Ruth also is still speaking in that broken speech pattern, as her powers are still broken.
They rehash the Evil Yellow Xavier personality that lives in David’s mindscape.
They kiss and David has found another M, the moon. I like how throughout the rest of the issue, Ruth keeps ending sentences with m- but gets cut off.
David asks if she is okay on the moon. She is as long as he doesn’t forget her oxygen, build a clock tower, turn blue or become naked. All references to Doctor Manhattan and Laurie in the Watchmen, issue nine – one of the better stand alone issues of that series.
David has no idea what she is talking about. She tells him it is from a comic book. Also interplanetary teleportation and how he has so much power he forgets how to be human. She draws a happy face on the moon to finish the homage.
There is an ad for Iron Man Rise of Technovore, which I haven’t seen. Imagined if Marvel could do more pure adaptions instead of these anime inspired true stories. Instead they do these, they don’t sell and so they don’t make any other DVDs. This one has Black Widow, War Machine, Hawkeye and Punisher.
David explains the motivations of Aakus the Aetheric, the villain of the issue, or would be villain.
Apparently, he reads a bunch of books and believes what he reads. So he reads about the mutant threat and goes off murdering mutants. First, no named mutants.
Secondly, Cyclops’ team, including Tempus, Emma, Triage, Magneto and Magik, hence me buying this issue.
Then nameless mutants again.
Ruth wants David to get the X-Men from the Jean Grey School.
David then tells her how hours have already pass and tells her how the X-Men have already failed. The X-Men shown are – Chamber, Storm, Beast, Wolverine, Pixie, Frenzy, Iceman and Armor.
They fail miserably. Ruth sees them all die. She is torn over this. David tries to sooth her by telling her it was only a story. The Yellow Xavier lets him see the future, so he already dealt with the problem.
An ad for Iron Man 3, so great.
Ruth is upset that he tricked her. Made her experience her teachers and friends’ deaths.
David then shows her what really happened. They have their date. While Aarkus is formulating his plan, David forces him to sleep. Forever.
Ruth doesn’t want him to do this course of action. In Watchmen fashion, he tells her he did it five hours ago.
Aarkus is essentially in a coma, and David drops him and Ruth back at the school.
David can’t live his father’s dream as the X-Men do, all passive and reactionary. No, he will be progressive and aggressive.
Issue ends with David and a few more m-words, madness, mutantkind and finally, monster.
Don’t worry about Aarkus, he wakes up and delivers some space justice in later issues.
This is the Iron Man title wherein he is trying to figure out who his birth parents are. Tony has caught up to childhood friend and current arms dealer, Cassandra Gillespie. Apparently, her dad may have told her who Tony’s father really was. Are there any golden age characters that could benefit from being placed back in the spotlight as Tony’s parents? They will have to be, right? Also, is Bendis’ reveal going to be who Kieron Gillan had in mind?
One Week Ago. But First! We have to do with the little matter of Tony trying to deal with the fallout of Civil War II’s first issue. Yesterday was the Celestial attack and the after party. Friday is his lady holographic assistant. I like that Magik is getting some good press there, being on multiple news feeds. Really, it was the magic empowered heroes who saved that day.
Tony wants Friday to do a search for who his biological parents are.
She’s been working on this search since Tony found out he was adopted – which would have been nice to have an editorial note stating which issue or trade I can find that information in. A quick Google search reveals that was in Iron Man 17, that way way back in October 2013! Such a long time to not pick up on that again.
Magik continues to be seen on the news coverage.
Tony asks Friday what she has discovered.
Bulgaria. Iron Man lands in the country, on a playground it looks like. I’m not sure why he didn’t go to the American Embassy. Which is in Sofia, Bulgaria.
Iron Man has a fun little exchange with Anna, a nice elderly lady. She can’t believe Tony Stark is in front of her, he asks what her name is and she says “Iron Man” as she is still processing it. He makes a joke about how he’s been called Iron Man, as well, for years. I like those little moments of levity.
He has come to the place where he was adopted from. Does that mean he is Bulgarian? That’s a big get for that country! He had to personally come here as their files have not been digitized. Tony is pretty sure someone took his file, most likely Howard Stark. Which makes complete sense, he’s rich and doesn’t want people to know he is adopting a kid – for business reasons, I’m sure.
Tony mentions how only Howard would know about the adoption. Anna corrects him, his birth parents knew as well. Tony isn’t thinking clearly with this matter.
Auckland, New Zealand. Twenty Years Ago. I imagine that the beginning of this flashback was in the previous issue. Cassandra and Tony are having a fight. Hydra apparently attacked her family, Tony suspects to get at him. Tony is running away from his parents, he thought she was running from her parents but they know where she is. Always good to check in with your parents. Cassandra wanted information about Howard, Tony doesn’t believe he ever mentioned him. Cassandra corrects him, that’s all he ever talked about.
Cassandra, again, tells Tony that she loves him. He doesn’t believe it. Howard shows up in SHIELD flying cars of that era. He doesn’t want the kids talking as Cassandra is a terrorist. Howard brought good ol’ Dum Dum Dugan, who has a sniper rifle pointed at her head. Howard is having SHIELD arrest her. Tony keeps trying to get a word in but classic Howard is shutting Tony down.
Hydra planes fly in and start firing on the SHIELD cars and the Starks. Cassandra runs away. Hydra agents land and grabs Cassandra. They open fire but Howard has a force field, so they are okay.
Bucharest. Gillespie Compound. Today. We see current day Cassandra, who has an eye patch over her left eye. Tony asks her who his biological father is. She has a gun pointing at his head. She reveals that her parents are dead, which surprises Tony. I take it, he didn’t do any research on his old friend.
Cassandra can’t believe Tony isn’t asking her how she is still alive. He goes right into the explanation of how clearly if she’s alive, she’s been working with Hydra. He’s been in the costume slash armor business for a long time now. He didn’t ask as it has nothing to do with the information he seeks.
Tony also knows that Cassandra has summoned Mandroids to their location. Tony originally created Mandroids for SHIELD, I had to look it up. I would have sworn they were AIM created and I was going to write how odd it is that a former Hydra agent now has AIM technology but that isn’t the case. In three minutes, the Mandroids should be arriving.
Cassandra didn’t know Tony was adopted, I imagine most don’t. She’s watched Tony’s superhero career unfold, expecting to run across him at any moment. It never happened.
Cassandra explains how silly it is that both Hydra and AIM are loud about their business practices. She has carved out a corner of the arms market that her clients appreciate is very discrete.
Tony asks if she thinks about him as he thinks about her all the time. I suspect he doesn’t but it is a nice thing to say. Cassandra wonders if Tony really is adopted or if this is some bad intel that he has been given. Which is a good point, I’m not sure of the actual story that revealed that he was adopted. How did that information come out?
Issue ends with the Mandriods arriving. Cassandra can’t let Tony leave as it will hurt her reputation. I suspect he makes it out of there alive.
Shadow and Flame with Magik 