So the answer to my question, how you name a fifth part of a four part storyline is to title it, Epilogue. I guess I would have still numbered them, 1 of 5, though.
Since this is the final chapter, I sort of like how we get a revisit to the characters’ early days.
That isn’t the most girlish panel of Illyana that I have ever seen but that has to be her, right? That is clearly a tractor behind Colossus. If not, I didn’t need to buy this issue.
I like how Fornes keeps the same pattern. Top Left – Cyttorak, Top Right – Cain Marko; Bottom Left – Colossus; Bottom Right – Charles Xavier. The placement makes sense, as Cyttorak’s story leads to Cain, I suppose it would make more sense to switch Xavier and Colossus, as Marko leads to Xavier easier and Xavier transitions to Colossus, easily as well. Though I do like how the corners work together. Cyttorak and Xavier have been both destructive, through their avatars or students. Marko and Colossus just been the front line.
It is a nice four page sequence.
Southeast Asia. Now. Colossus is trying to hold off Juggernaut. Cyttorak granted Colossus’ wish, to be given more power than ever before, power enough to kill Cyttorak. Cyttorak choose, instead, to give it to Marko. Cain wants to avenge his brother (I’m glad someone picked up this plot point. It was nice when Carey remembered it for David in Legacy) by killing Cyclops.
Since Juggernaut isn’t going to be convinced, with words, to not kill Cyclops – Storm instructs the team to take off Juggernaut’s helmet.
Marko takes off the helmet, and his head sort of looks like Neuro’s head, so even without the helmet, he is resistant to telepaths. In fact, Juggernaut has no weaknesses.
Juggernaut puts the helmet back on, all of the X-Men let Xavier die so they are all targets of his. Colossus stands before him and starts wailing on him. He is pretty sure that he breaks his hands. Oddly, he narrates that he is one of the strongest beings on the planet. I’m pretty sure that he is on the weaker end of that scale. I doubt he is even in the top ten.
One punch later from Juggernaut, Colossus is regretting his decision, even more. Colossus searches for another strategy, and he things “what would Logan do?” Wolverine would have cheated. Apparently they were on a cliff and Colossus breaks the ground under their feet and Juggernaut goes into the ocean. They both end up in the ocean but Colossus comes to the shore first. The X-Men joke about last issue’s reveal that Colossus likes to make the self-sacrifice.
Since Juggernaut is unstoppable, he is still sinking to the bottom of the ocean.
Issue ends with the gathered X-Men choosing to not warn Cyclops and Juggernaut punches his way through the rock bottom.
Pretty good arc, I would say! Who knows if I will get the next issue.
Or issue 250 of Volume One, pending on who you ask. Since the Indicia states, 45, that’s the one I’m going with. I own this for
Deadpool Roasts the Marvel Universe
An Infinity Gauntlet Tie-In
Words Gerry Duggan & Brian Posehn
Lines Scott Koblish
Hues Val Staples
Balloons VC’s Joe Sabino
Special Thanks to David Mandell
How great is it that 24 years later, we are getting an Infinity Gauntlet tie-in!?! So great!
You can tell that we are about to begin a twenty page awesome story with just that title page above! I’m surprised the entire thing isn’t on the Internet yet (as oppose to other stories being fully available, maybe it is the length of it?)
“The writers chose to write bizarre versions of current characters and to include characters that had never been seen before. . . . wait 24 years” so great.
Then. Deadpool has just successfully stolen something. Inferno is coming, Spider-Man is a clone, Phoenix is dead – pretty much tells us where we are in the world of Marvel. Gosh, from 1991 to 2015, so much has happened!
Deadpool’s client is . . . Thanos, in his legendary Thanos-copter (of course). Thanos had Deadpool steal him a cosmic cube. Turns out, Deadpool didn’t give Thanos the real cube, he used it to snatch the Infinity Gauntlet from Thanos.
What does Deadpool do with the most powerful item in the universe? One Night One : Deadpool Roasts the Marvel Universe. This will be my second most favorite Marvel Roast. Deadpool does this so that he can get back at everybody that has kept him down. A lady mistakes him for Spider-Man, so he erases her from continuity. Before he can start, Howard the Duck arrives. Howard changes the marquee, as it is in his rider to – Deadpool Roasts the Marvel Universe Special, Guest MC : Howard the Duck.
Deadpool’s dais consists of – Hulk, Spider-Man, Thor and Nick Fury.
I own this entire $9.99 comic due to the one panel that Magik appears in above! Emma gets a line later in the comic and Illyana isn’t even in that panel!
Like any good roast, there is a common easy joke that everyone can make, in Deadpool’s case, it is his face. His face is pretty tore back, due to his cancer, which is pretty messed up to make fun of him for it.
Howard makes a great joke about how everyone only likes Deadpool when he graces their comic cover, as that is a boost to their sales.
There is a great panel of how the blind characters got horrible seats. There is Stick, Shroud, Daredevil, Blindfold, her mother, Destiny, Madame Web, Echo and Blind Al. I thought Echo was deaf and not blind.
The first roaster is Wolverine, wearing a Goblin Queen outfit, but he doesn’t know it. Elektra is enjoying herself. Sabretooth is not happy that he is trying to be the new Wolverine.
Storm is up next, she is surprised to see that Hitler is in attendance. Magneto isn’t happy to discovery that Hitler is sitting at the table behind his. Hitler gleefully says that he was the star of issue 26, the issue prior to Deadpool and Shiklah’s wedding.
Deadpool starts to grow tired of Howard’s antics and makes a reference to Howard’s after credits scene in Guardians of the Galaxy.
Thanks to YouTuber Eczavier Chaff for hosting this video.
Emma is tired of this silly business. I wish Magik got to be appear in that panel! Poor Phoebe, she still can’t get colorist to color her hair red, outside of Uncanny and All New.
Cable is up next and he is extremely tired of being paired with Deadpool. There is a second theme of the roast, that people are just plain tired of Deadpool.
Thor states that no one likes Deadpool, god or mortal. Deadpool’s face looks like Heidrun the Goat’s backside, which looks like Mangog’s backside. Magog does not appreciate that and makes fun of Thor via a Thunderstrike reference.
Spider-Man gets on the mic and bombs. He references seeing Gwen’s dead and her father, George Stacey’s death. He discusses the Venom symbiote, Agent Venom states that Spider-Man likes it. Spider-Man tries to fake that Doctor Octopus has controlled again. Doctor Octopus chimes in, that he is the superior joke teller.
Daredevil jokes that he has heard back things. Howard the Duck makes fun of the lame joke and Blind Al swears at him, again.
Kim, who has had forced surgery to look like a purple Nightcrawler (I reviewed an issue he was appeared in issue 38 of Volume Three). He compliments Deadpool, so Howard pushes him off the stage. Kurt, the real Nightcrawler, takes the stage and claims that being dead is funnier than listening to Deadpool.
Agent Adsit takes the stage. He chooses to not make any jokes about Deadpool’s face – instead, going after Little Deadpool. He describes it as being a hot dog that has been microwaved too long. Shiklah laughs so hard, as it is so true.
Michael the Necromancer states that he is no hero but neither is Deadpool, which isn’t the most untruthful thing to say.
Hulk is next. He starts strong, with stating that he is the strongest there is. Except in stink, Deadpool wins that. When the jokes don’t go over well, he smashes his way out of the room.
Nick Fury Jr. is next but he doesn’t know what to say, so his father steps in. Proper Nick (not the old guy from Original Sin, so this must be a LMD) states that Deadpool is the worst guy in the universe. Which, funny enough, insults Hitler.
Captain America (but also not old) states that he doesn’t get a lot of Deadpool’s jokes but ends with a cheesy joke about how Deadpool and Red Skull must share a dermatologist.
Doctor Strange says that Deadpool covers his pain with jokes and wishes that no one had to be present for this.
A giant lizard dude shows up but isn’t name checked, I was hoping he would be. Deadpool and Thor tore him a new one and now he shits in a bag, which he offers to show people. I wish we got the name and the issue number that happened in.
The Ghost of Benjamin Franklin gets a turn. He comments on how horrible Deadpool’s face is that people are ignoring the fact that he is a horrible friend and pretty shallow.
Shiklah (I can’t seem to remember how to spell her name) takes the microphone. She agrees that his face isn’t great, vampires even feel bad for him but he is the hottest man she has ever met. They have a rule, no matter how much they battle, their love making is that much more intense.
Agent Preston gets her turn, her son – Jeff – wrote the jokes. The jokes are all poop jokes but funny poop jokes. “Your face looks like a doody took a doody on it. Your face looks like a sewer farted on it. Your face caught on fire and someone tried to put it out with poop. You face looks like a wizard made a poop sword and a young knight pulled it out of a poop stone and stabbed your face with it.” Deadpool is very proud.
Deadpool finally gets to defend himself. He gets a swipe at Alpha Flight. Because he is wearing the Infinity Gauntlet, his jokes are super funny to those who hear them and everyone starts laughing. He starts taking shots at the guests. Man Thing’s table is giant size. Deadpool has never killed anyone in a wheelchair, unlike Cyclops. Though Xavier wasn’t in a wheelchair at that time. Deadpool says that once Domino is done with her guest panel, she will go back to obscurity. Nightcrawler isn’t able to teleport away, as people start noticing something is wrong.
Deadpool was making people laugh as nothing matter, as he thinks about his origins retold in five panels (the lights of the Infinity Gems). Due to him wearing the Infinity Gauntlet, he can see us, the reader. Deadpool is depress as he knows he isn’t real and his torments are due to us needing to be entertain. Howard the Duck knows who Deadpool is talking too, as Howard the Duck was breaking the fourth wall decades before Deadpool came out of Rob Liefeld’s pen.
Issue ends with Thanos, still in the Thanos-copter. Deadpool gives Thanos the Infinity Gauntlet and is kicked out of the copter.
The other stories in the issue are –
The main story, which is pretty fun.
Thanks to the Recap page, we learn that Deadpool has a daughter, Ellie, and Agent Preston has been raising her.
U.L.T.I.M.A.T.I.U.M. is going after Deadpool’s friends and family but they are being killed as they make their attempts. Agent Adsit is shot though. Flag Smasher suspects Deadpool is going to go the traditional route of over reacting and barge at them with the full fury of an animated wounded animal. Instead. Deadpool has a plan that pretty much goes as he planned it. Deadpool has everything finalized, including buying a farm in Kansas and he invites U.L.T.I.M.A.T.I.U.M. to attack him. Deadpool starts killing everyone of these foolish fools. He makes a AXIS reference by referring to his Zenpool identity. Deadpool saves Flag Smasher for last. Wade Wilson kills Deadpool, so that he can keep his friends safe and that he can spend time with his wife and child.
Six Days Later. Everyone is on a stolen yacht. Agent Adsit is in a wheelchair, so he lives.
The final Incursion between the Proper Marvel Earth and the Ultimate Earth. Wade thought all of this Incursion silliness was Avengers nonsense, which I thought so as well. Wade hugs his daughter one last time.
The main story ends with the Death of Deadpool but also, of everyone else as the Incursion of the Proper Marvel Earth and the Ultimate Earth begins.
There is a section of stories regarding Deadpool’s Pals ‘N’ Gals
Shiklah in Shiklah’s Catching Up (this credit page is what I kept referring back to so that I spelled her name right)
Agent Preston in The Family S.H.I.E.L.D.
Evan Sabahnur in What Do We Want? Apocalypse! When Do We Want It? Now!
Agent Scott Adsit in The Thwipster and the Quipster Battel the Hipsters!
Benjamin Franklin in All About the Benjamins
Michael the Necromancer in Parents : The Meeting
Then came the Roast
There is a three pages of #RIPdeadpool reprints that I wish I had known about so that I could have gotten involved.
Finally, a fun page of Clark Gregg yelling at editor Jordan D. White for killing off Deadpool.
As much as I’m not crazy about Colossus, him and his sister, Magik, being on the team, guarantees that she should get plenty of panel time.
I really like Humberto Ramos experimenting with his sytle, as that is an awesome cover for issue six!
It really is the A-List title, with the roster of – Magik, Storm, Nightcrawler, Old Man Logan, Teen Jean Grey and Colossus.
There is a question posed about if Banshee will be appearing in the title, I thought he was back in the realm of the dead, after that Apocalypse Twins storyline in Uncanny Avengers, wherein he was the Horseman of Death, one of them. Apparently, that storyline ends with Banshee being taken in by the X-Men, to start the long healing process.
I like that Magik is going to get her own spotlight storyline, I’m really looking forward to that! It also sounds like she won’t be as glib as she has been shown to be, in the past.
Kitty Pryde is on Lemire’s list of characters he hopes to write, one day, he does say that he has got to write a few of them, so maybe we will see her within the pages of these series.
We are definitely going to be getting an X-Men / Inhumans crossover, even if Marvel hasn’t hinted or announced it.
Sinister is the villain of the first arc, that doesn’t excite me too much.
Lemire is a huge Kitty Pryde fan but won’t be able to write her, for the first couple issues. He references that she is in a couple titles so I wonder what her other title is?
Storm is the new leader of mutants, which makes sense with the other players off the board.
Not too much is revealed, in either interview, but these interviews are part of the hype factory and it is nice to see interior art.
So that is why it came out when 39 came out, and I wanted to do the Black Vortex issues as a group so I also am writing this after 37. I imagine that the story that was hinted above, will probably show up in issue 600. There is 40 pages of that issue, but I reckon that if she didn’t get any pages done, the story above is never going to be seen. Not that I was all that excited to read a Bobby and Hank buddy book, especially as they have barely hung out for 37 issues prior to this. Instead, we got a Jean and Emma story.
Madripoor. Magik has teleporrted Jean and Emma, so that Emma can give Jean some in the filed training. Magik doesn’t want to leave the ladies behind. I don’t blame Illyana for not wanting to go back to the school. What is there for her to do that will trump this adventure. Illyana leaves and the issue suffers for it.
Jean talks about how Illyana is getting tired of being a taxi service, which more people need to talk about that. She has so much potential but instead, she ends up bookending stories.
Emma gives a brief history of Madripoor. It was a Hydra Terrority, a Ninja Assassin Terrority and then Mystique’s attempt at a mutant paradise. Jean also learns about MGH, Mutant Growth Hormone, which apparently has been around forever now. I thought it was something that came along in the 90s with the Legacy Virus but it has been around since 1972, with Amazing Adventures 11,which is the first appearance of Grey Furry Beast. That’s two things!
Emma shuts off Jean’s telepathy, she can do that. I like Emma implication that Xavier was putting blocks on Jean’s mind since their first sessions together. Jean can’t believe it but if she just researched Xavier’s deeds, she would find out that he has done so much worst.
Emma’s powers have come back as she has been earning them back, with the assistance of the Cuckoos.
Emma’s goal for Jean, today, is to practice her telekinesis. Jean claims she uses her telekinesis but she isn’t flying about.
Jean finds her target, the Blob, who is both in charge of Madripoor and extremely addicted to MGH. Bob is confused as Jean looks so much smaller here than how he remembers her. Which I like, the existence of the Original Five is not a known detail to the public at large. Though Mystique knows but she must not have told Blog about that.
Jean throws Blob across the room, along with everyone else but he gets right back up and charges at her. Something I wouldn’t want done to me. He flings Jean across the island. Jean is littler and Blog is much larger. Like Kitty, I enjoy seeing Jean use a gun, of course, bullets have no effect on the unmovable object.
That could make a decent What If, the Blob did join the X-Men, way back in Uncanny X-Men 3.
Jean and Blob end up floating about in the sky. He calls her bluff and she drops him to the ground. The fall doesn’t kill him but he is knocked out. Emma approves of the session and gives Jean back her telepathy.
Issue ends with Emma wanting Jean to be better. Magik isn’t coming to pick them up but how does someone leave an island? I imagine Emma keeps a credit card on her for these circumstances.
Cover is a tad disappointing as Gamora and Warren should be cosmicly enhanced. I know that they couldn’t have revealed that three months ago, when the covers are first shown but they could have changed that by the time the issue came out. Instead of the Jean Grey Cosmic Variant, they should have just redone this cover – but with the new versions of Gamora and Warren. That would have been both cool and appropriate.
Issue opens with Gamora checking on Beast, who is crying as he has finally realized that he is the worst. He broke space and time, and there is no fixing it.
We are treated to another Beast diagram, this time with Excalibur making a reference (on the left side).
Hala, Homeworld of the Kree, The Crown Jewel of the Kree Empire. Carol is speaking to the Supreme Intelligence. She references how she is part-Kree but she was forced to be part-Kree (that is what the Brood did to her, right, when they accidentally turned her into Binary – or am I remembering that wrong?)
Supreme Intelligence still doesn’t want to do anything with the Black Vortex, it was missing for thousands of years, and he rather it stayed that way. Supreme Intelligence goes further to threaten that since Earthlings attacked the Kree throneworld, there will be repercussions for Earth.
Drax provides the information that I needed last time and should have remembered. The Enhanced heroes were deciding their next move when the Kree showed up, and snatched the Black Vortex. Which caused the trio to go to Hala and attack the city. That’s all I needed and now that I typed all of that, I bet it was on the recap page of Guardians Team-Up 3.
Supreme Intelligence wants to rehide the Black Vortex. Jean establishes a mind-link with Carol, Quill, Storm and Drax. Quill starts getting loud with the floating head and Storm gives the command. Nova swipes the Black Vortex and rockets out of there. I like how young Jean and Nova are, as she says “go go go” and he responds with a “I’m go go going!” Which is a simple (and enjoyable) way to show their youthfulness.
Captain Marvel punches Supreme Intelligence to his dumb face. Nova gets outside and sees that the Kree Armada is still outside and now he is on the run again. On the fly again?
Back inside, Supreme Intelligence tells the Kree to stop fighting the heroes, and to go after the child Nova. I like Quill commenting on the fact that they don’t really have an exit strategy. Add ‘strategy’ to words that I can’t spell, this is getting bad ya’ll.
Jean reshows that she still has that super move, of collecting psychic energy and an harnessing that into her purple form. It helps that Supreme Intelligence is practically all psychic energy (as he has thousands of years of knowledge in his head). From the coloring, it doesn’t appear as if she turns purple – but it has been quite some time since she has shown this trick. Was it the last crossover, the Trial of Jean Grey, it may have been.
The Flying Fortress of Mister Knife. J-Son and his ship are right above Nova. J-Son gives the order and the ship starts raining down missiles to the planet. Supreme Intelligence shouts that everyone needs to leave. Quill gets everyone off planet, as well.
Hala is destroyed. J-Son has reached Phoenix level of evil! Jean can’t believe she finally gets to see a planet die. The heroes are not sure if Nova is dead or if the Black Vortex was destroyed in the explosion.
J-Son is advised to leave the scene of the crime but he wants to watch the continued destruction. I suppose I would too, as how often does one get to break a planet in half? But one has to watch from a safe distance. One has to wonder what stops J-Son from doing the same to Earth. Besides all of Earth’s heroes putting a stop to it.
J-Son wants Misa to hand over the cosmic mirror but he doesn’t have it. We see that Nova is unconscious and the mirror is floating next to him.
Cut to Magik and Rocket (I would like to see what these two have been talking about for the previous pages). Rocket is having a bad reaction to all of Magik’s teleporting.
Gamora is happy to see her friend, which worries Rocket, as she is never happy. I do like Gamora referring to her as, Lady Magik. Magik tells her that they need the trio’s help.
Beast is still having his “Beast is horrible” revelation and Rocket just responds with “sucks to be you then.” And it really does!
Magik offers that she can help the trio deal with the burden of the cosmos that are enhancing them, as she has been dealing with her own dark force inside of her and she’s been doing that since she has been seven! That Bendis, he really does have a good grasp on Illyana.
Beast senses something and tells everyone to get down.
Everyone is blasted backwards. Beast informs them that Hala is gone. Magik is concern for her friends, possible, only really concern about Quill – as his death would upset Kitty. At least a little bit, I give her less than six months to get over him and probably forget all about him until the next Peter comes around.
With this new development, Gamora promises the trio’s aid to the regular heroes.
Inside the Flying Fortress. Scott, Bobby and Groot are held captive, so we are not waiting months before checking on them – and I’m glad for that. Groot’s inability to say more than three words (and those same words in the exact order, every time) is starting to rattle Bobby. J-Son comes to check on his captives.
J-Son is keeping them alive as he wants to trade their lives for the Black Vortex, and he knows that Nova still has it.
Issue ends with Nova floating in space, which naturally leads us to his own title and Part Eight! We are still moving at a pretty decent clip!
I skipped last issue, but I’m sure we will get caught up fast.
Southeast Asia. A new Juggernaut was chosen. The new avatar of Cyttorak is . . . The Living Monolith! Does Havok get a power boost due to this change? The Living Mononaut is a giant, due to all of the energy he just absorbed. Which is giant unstoppable villain, isn’t ideal. Shame that story will never be told. Are Havok and Living Monolith still connected? Was Living Monolith the strongest he ever was, when Havok was in space? Whatever happened during the time when Alex was in the criminally-never referenced Mutant X dimension.
Cyttorak is not thrilled with his new avatar.
Rockslide comes out of the rumble, and is upset that he isn’t the new Juggernaut. Kurt comments that Rockslide is alive and Northstar makes a very inappropriate comment about how he wishes Rockslide was dead.
Firestar is not impress that none of these X-Men are taking this serious. She claims Living Mononaut is some thousand-foot tall giant. Iceman rebuts her that he is barely 800 feet tall. Bobby is pretty awful in this issue.
Storm tells the team that Ahmet Abdol, the Living Mononaut, once grew to the size of a planet. I wish an editor note came with that comment, as that sounds interesting.
Rachel comments that she can’t read Living Mononaut’s mind.
Storm decides she can’t deal with this and sits down. Which starts my favorite part of the issue. Yost’s character work is pretty top notch.
There is an ad for Atlantic City Boardwalk Con (AC*BC) that was from May 14-17, 2015. The cool thing is that they use a cosplayer dressed as Scarlet Spider.
I wouldn’t mind wearing a Scarlet Spider costume, if someone wants to make one for me or something.
We get some great character interactions for several pages. Storm doesn’t want to fight anymore. Storm has been in a mood lately. Northstar doesn’t miss the opportunity to say that she is horrible, he is totally right. Storm recalls the times that she and Kurt use to dance. He recalls the times when Storm was in her clothing-optional phase.
Rockslide can’t believe that the X-Men are amazingly sitting on their arses. Cain Marko can’t believe this is what he is seeing. I like that Marko is dressed all in black, instead of a Juggernaut redish orange – he isn’t a Power Ranger. Colossus isn’t sitting down either.
Living Mononaut is monologuing when he realizes that his intended audience is nowhere to be found.
Embarrassingly, Firestar asks Northstar what the biggest threat he and Alpha Flight have ever faced. Northstar answers The Great Beasts, which this team (including Firestar) just fought in a previous storyline.
Rachel wants to just ask Living Mononaut what he wants, Bobby dismisses that idea.
Pixie recalls how the New X-Men (I guess they actually called themselves that) fought – Crazy people, future robots, big metal dogs, demons but no giants. Rockslide believes that they could have defeated a giant somebody. Pixie comments that she could just teleport everybody home, they don’t need to sit on the premises of the would-be battle, if they are never going to do anything.
They discuss ways to defeat Living Monolith and the Juggernaut. Thor usually defeats Living Monolith by throwing him into space (which seems to be the worst way to defeat him). Depriving him of cosmic energy, is a better way. Bobby offers that one calls Spider-Man, in order to defeat Juggernaut. Marko is so fast and stating that Spider-Man got lucky. Marko says that psychics are the solution but who can remove the Living Mononaut’s giant helmet?
Storm loses all credibility (again) by apologizing to Colossus, for being harsh to him. Storm didn’t want to bring Colossus along, as he would be tempted to sacrifice himself to Cyttorak, and become the new avatar. Bobby echos the sentiment, going as far as to say that Colossus is very, martyr-prone. If only Colossus was more willing to get himself killed. Colossus wonders if the Avengers are this hard on each other, Firestar reveals that they are. Oh, we need more references of Firestar’s era on Busiek’s Avengers team.
Firestar offers that magic seems to defeat Juggernaut, as it is his power source, in a way. Northstar offers that they call the horrible Scarlet Witch, which Kurt is foolishly trying to get Wanda redeemed. I doubt it will ever happen, but anything that gives us Nocturne, is pretty good.
Colossus offers up that his sister was able to free him of his responsibilities of Cyttorak, which is why I bought this issue.
Pixie offers that she has a soul dagger, but it isn’t the same. Bobby says it harsher than that and hurts Pixie’s feelings.
Colossus asks who brought up asking Living Mononaut what he wants. Bobby is quick to point out that it was Rachel, Colossus says she was wrong, which makes Bobby laugh. He is a real jerk in this issue. Colossus wants to ask Cyttorak what he wants. I guess he senses that Cyttorak must be unhappy. Marko guesses that it is chaos, destruction, pain and suffering. Colossus wonders what comes after that, he wants to change the game. Storm senses that Colossus is going to make Storm fight. He will buy her dinner afterwards.
Colossus stands up, as the others leave to fight Living Mononaut, which is a waste of a good nickname. Colossus shouts for Cyttorak to hear his call. Pixie doesn’t think this is going to work, right when Cyttorak takes control of Rachel and Pixie’s minds. Marko can’t believe that worked, Colossus seems surprised as well.
Cyttorak (I finally learn how to spell it) addresses Marko and Colossus as his avatars (which is why I called them that) and his failures, which I like. Colossus predicts that Living Monolith is going to fail, at some point.
Colossus offers that Cyttorak give Colossus the power of the Juggernaut, with the power, he will fight Cyttorak to the death. Colossus wants even more power than Cyttorak has ever given to anyone. Cyttorak accepts the deal.
Living Monolith loses his Juggernaut powers. We get the new Juggernaut, coming out of the sky and he punches Living Monolith. He shouts, I”m the Juggernaut (no bitch) which is something that wouldn’t work in live action or animation as we would totally know who the new Juggernaut is.
Which isn’t really a surprised as, once you flip the page, you learn on your own that it isn’t Juggerossus. Cyttorak accepted the offer but not the players.
Issue ends with a clear shot of the new design for the Juggernaut. Another odd thing about this issue is that the next issue caption reads, Colossus verses the Juggernaut! But the past four issues have all stated “Part ____ of Four” so shouldn’t they all have stated, Part _____ of Five”? Was Yost given a bonus issue like how Bendis had to do so with Uncanny and All New, due to Secret Wars 2015? Well, for Bendis, it was AXIS. Should this issue have been Four of Five and not Conclusion?
I’m not sure if I will be getting the next issue but this one was pretty good.
Letters Artmonkey’s Dave Lanphear & Virtual Calligraphy’s Chris Eliopoulos and Rus Wooton
Cover Dated February 2006
What If the Fantastic Four were Cosmonauts?
We are kicking Fantastic Four Month off with this issue!
So in 2006, Marvel tested out an idea of Uatu the Watcher not being the host of What Ifs. The Watcher here is Hector Espejo, who is a super hacker. He found an alternate time line. So there were six oneshots that were released, with the concept of seeing how different this one Alternate Timeline was, instead of looking at six different timelines. This is the only one I read so I am not sure if all of them actually line up or not. They had the foresight of making sure each one took place in a different decade, so they don’t have to really connect, just not conflict with each other.
The six titles / eras are :
Feudal Japan’s Devil Who Dares (get it?)
Civil War’s Captain America (actual civil war)
Prohibition’s Wolverine
WWII Namor (so not much different there)
Post-War Fantastic Four (this comic)
Thor being the Herald of Galactus, not sure where that one takes place, but it seems like it is a space opera, so it probably just ends with this timeline ceasing to exist.
The actual concept starts on the third page and naturally it has the Russian foursome’s space ship being bombarded with cosmic rays.
The Fantastic Four here are – Reed Richards, Natasha Romanova, Illyana Rasputin and Piotr Rasputin – not a bad line up!
I remember when the 2006 What Ifs were announced and how excited I was to not only have more What Ifs in our lives but that Marvel had the great idea to put their most famous three Russians into the same comic! Plus, keep Reed Richards and you have a decent Fantastic Four!
Illyana is a Corporal. Natasha is ex-KGB and a Major.
Lieutenant Von Doom,who only appears on these first pages, informs the Premier that the four cosmonauts not only survived but have been changed. Latveria is a member of the Soviet Union.
Doom is going to name them, The Ultimate Federalist Freedom Fighters (UFFF).
Piotr Rasputin is Colossus – the Thing of the team.
Iliana has the power of camouflage – the Invisible Woman of the team.
Rudion Richards can open up discontinuities in his own body – the . . . Reed Richards of the team? I like how Carey found an interesting way to do his power. His limbs still ‘stretch’ distances but instead of it actually doing that, his limbs ‘blast off’ from his body, so it is the same effect, essentially.
Natasha is a lady Electro, called the Widow Maker (get it?) – the Human Torch of the team. A bet of a stretch but it works.
I like them addressing the Rasputin / Romanoff real world connection.
Rud, what a name!, has to explain how he has an American last name. His father got with a local peasant girl and left.
I like that smirk Iliana makes when she is named the team’s KB Liaison, she is so proud of the honor.
Nice homage panel to the Fantastic Four first issue. Not sure if the one on the right is an homage.
Iliana is the Bucky Barnes of the team, but before he was Winter Soldier.
Rud starts not liking their new missions as they seem to be attacking regular people, unarmed people.
We start seeing that Colossus is slowly losing his mind and becoming the big dummy we know him to be.
Ilana and Natasha have no qualms about following orders, no matter what they are. They are good KGB Agents.
The UFFF are officially under the KGB umbrella, due to their own field commander being dead.
Rud mistakenly believes since the guy who gave them orders is dead, they should report back to base. Iliana wastes no time in letting him know how wrong he is. Boy, do I wish Magik and Reed Richards could get this much screen time together!
Natasha has found Rud’s father, who Rud hasn’t spoken to or written to since sending a letter stating his own mother had passed. Rud visits him in jail.
Nice how the Daily Bugle exists on this Earth, of course it would.
The UFFF are sent to fight the Avengers in Cuba. The Avengers are – Giant Man, Wasp, Captain America and Iron Man. So it will be four on four, which is fair.
I’m not sure how this Captain America relates to the Captain America from the Actual Civil War days What If issue that came out along with this one, but that’s a question I have.
Giant Man is the first one to physically approach the UFFF.
Iliana tries to shoot her gun but Captain America throws his mighty shield and stops the bullet.
Colossus gets a mad on for Captain America due to that, which he should.
I’m not wrong in that the panel layout is unusual on that page, right? There is something about how the middle panel with Iron Man is that forces my eyes to adjust to it.
Iron Man absorbs Widow Maker’s electricity, which gives him a boost.
Iliana sets herself up for another kill shot, but Wasp zaps her.
Giant Man gets out of the water, and tries to warn Wasp from attacking Iliana.
Iliana starts shooting wildly to get Wasp to stop with her attack.
Rud quickly realizes they were not prepared for this. Which makes sense as their latest fights have been against unarmed folks, so one gets use to that type of enemy (the kind that don’t fight back) so they are not as battle ready as they should be. I imagine the Avengers are fighting the fights we now they do.
Colossus fights Iron Man, which makes sense as they are Men of Steel.
Rud gets an idea to even the battleground. Giant Man attacks Colossus. Rud notices the device that controls Giant Man’s height.
We get a small taste of what Millar / Hitch also did in Ultimates with how Giant Man’s innards work when he grows. Like there, Giant Man’s heart and lungs can’t support this new height.
For some reason, Iliana really wants to kill the Avengers – maybe she was given special orders. Just like Winter Soldier, who came after this.
Captain America comes over to try to Iliana, as she is just firing blind but rubble is falling towards her. He saves her, Wasp dials the device back, shrinking Giant Man.
Captain America turns his back to Iliana to inform Colossus that his sister is okay.
Rud finally makes his way to Natasha, who has been unconscious for pages now. He feels bad for not taking all of the biology as a factor to the harm Giant Man would have felt. This Richards hasn’t had much time to be a scientist.
Iliana is looking for her gun as the heroes are regrouping.
Giant Man is now just regular size, Wasp is looking over him. Iron Man lands for the assist.
Iliana puts her gun to Captain America, who is also walking over to his fallen ally. She pulls the trigger as Colossus puts his hand in front of the barrel. The gun backfires and kills her. Yet another Colossus, yet another character’s death that I like so much more than him. Alternate Reality Colossuses are the worst!
Either Colossus really doesn’t know or he is becoming that dumb, but he tells Rud that he doesn’t know what happened to his sister.
Rud opens the dimension that he uses to transport his limbs and he teleports the entire team away.
Their commanding officers are dead. Natasha reveals that super humans are appearing more regularly every day. This new group of people will need a leader. Rud wants to just spend time in his lab, so Natasha will be the actual ruler and Rud just the puppet head.
Issue ends with Rud going to try to smarten his friend up and there will be no rulers, everyone will be an equal.
Not a bad issue.
Inside back cover ad is for the excellent game, X-Men Legends II, Rise of Apocalypse.
Which it wasn’t really the interview but the preview art by Checchetto :
I’m pretty much coming into this cold, so let’s hope this recap page is informative. In the future, Cannonball and Smasher have a baby. Smasher’s real name is, Izzy. In the past, Smasher tells Captain America that she is falling in love with a teammate, who is Cannonball. I believe that was during Infinity.
The Present. Avengers Tower. Smasher narrates the opening of the issue. Her full name is Izzy Kane. Smasher, typically, is a member of the Shi’Ar Imperial Guard. She has done a pregnancy test and it has come back . . . positive! The Imperial Guard shows up at this point and tells her that she needs to come home.
The Guthrie Farm. Cumberland County, Kentucky. Bobby and Sam have gone home, well, Sam’s home. Melody, one of Sam’s many siblings, wants to meet Izzy. Sam references how it has been a long time since he has met someone special. I guess he has had Dani Moonstar and Lila Cheny as love interests. Melody references how she has mutant powers, so that’s another Guthrie child, making four total – if I’m counting right.
Izzy holo-calls Sam and informs him that she is leaving the planet on short notice. By the time she starts talking, she is done.
On the ship, Smasher tells her mentor (or a guy named, Mentor) that she is ready to leave the planet behind. Once they come out of hyperdrive, the doctors want to inspect her new ‘seed’ as it should be a source of power for the Shi’ar.
Kentucky. Ma Guthrie tells Sam about how she met his father. They met at a fair, as they were from different counties, they had a nice time but went their separate ways. Afterwards, he went to every farm until he found her again. Oh the days before Facebook! She tells him to go after Smasher.
Avengers Tower. Manifold, who I believe was an Avenger during Infinity, tells Sam that the Avengers can’t help him. Bobby wants to help his oldest friend but they don’t know anyone with a spaceship. Sam actually knows someone with a spaceship, so there is still hope.
The New Xavier School. Sam (and Bobby’s) friend is of course . . . Magik! I wish Checchetto got to draw a proper page of Magik, instead we get this double page splash (which looks cool) that we only see the back of her head (twice) and see her from behind in the bottom left corner of the page.
I really like the idea of Magik staying in touch with Cannonball, well, I imagine it is Sam who keeps in touch with everybody he has ever worked with.
So Sam knows Illyana and she knows Young Scott Summers, who is a current member of the Starjammers, so it is their ship that Sam and Bobby are going to tag along on. The Starjammers’ ship should be able to catch up to the Shi’ar ship as they head to their homeworld, Chandilar.
Magik references that young Scott appriciates the chance to see his old All New X-Men teammates but it would have been nice to see a glimpse of the entire cast but I get that Barbiere doesn’t want to get too involved with the X-Men’s current storylines.
Sunspot references what Kitty Pryde knows, nothing good ever comes to the X-Men when they leave the planet. Sam tells Bobby that he isn’t coming with him. Bobby doesn’t fight him, as he has a company to run. He recently bought AIM, so that’s the company I believe.
One of the Starjammers says, “Let’s go catch that Shi’ar bird!” which I like the reminder that the Shi’ar evolve from birds. Sam calls both Illyana and Sunspot his best friends and the page ends with Sunspot calling him, Tiger.
Shi’ar ship. Mentor keeps calling her baby, a seed. I would have corrected him so that he stop calling it that. At least call it an egg or something. Also, it is a cold expression that I get keeps the fetus as a detached thing. I only imagine that Smasher gives birth and the child is enlisted into the Smasher Corp (if that is what it is called).
Mentor’s poor choice of words keeps getting worst as he refers to the fetus as, Spawn of their Guardians.
Corsair is right, their ship caught up to Smasher’s, rather quickly. Scott has become quite the space pirate. Cannonball is an honorary pirate now. The Shi’ar crew freaks out as they are yanked out of hyperspace (so the medical exam hasn’t occurred yet). Smasher isn’t quite happy with Cannonball being there.
Corsair makes a reference to the Guardians with the Galaxy with a Rocket mention. Sam goes for a hug but is shot down. He wants to confess his love to her, but the Shi’ar crew come back to their senses and go on the attack. Corsair tries to calm the situation down.
Once Mentor knows that Cannonball is Smasher’s partner, he puts him down from the force field. Izzy talks to Sam, recognizing that it is a sweet gesture coming all the way out there to space, just for her.
I really love X-Nerd Wil Moss giving us a note to check out Uncanny X-Men 341, the issue that Cannonball went toe-to-toe with Gladiator, it is also a Christmas issue.
Sam finally gets to tell Izzy that he loves her and Corsair has such a great reaction, pumping his fist to the sky.
They are all in rogue space, so they get attacked by a third party. Cannonball tells the crews that he will take care of this as it is his fault, the Starjammers were only doing him a favor. Smasher is coming along, as she wants to show the universe how great of a couple they are. Corsair wants them to hurry, as he doesn’t want his ship attacked next.
Smasher tries to tell Cannonball their big news but they have to shake off the alien ship, which isn’t a ship – it is a giant alien! Cannonball gets tangled up and is about to be eaten when Smasher does her thing and frees him. She states that she love Sam too.
They straight up explode the alien!
Back on the ship, Sam tries to assure her that he is ready for whatever comes next. With that, she tells him that she is pregnant. He is super excited but is now worried that she should have stayed on the ship.
Corsair is told to get off Mentor’s ship. Once they leave, Mentor turns to Cannonball and tells him he is worthy and that he is Shi’ar now.
Issue ends with them on Chandilar, Months Later. Sam Guthrie is a proud parent of a baby boy.
Next issue, Sunspot vs AIM, which I doubt I will buy.
The Longshot team of Nocenti and Adams came back for this giant sized annual.
I own this for the Magik appearances!
According to the polybag I keep the issue in, this comic cost me eight dollars!
Dead of night at Xavier’s School for the Gifted. Warlock is watching ten television sets.
Apparently, he is watching it very loudly as the rest of the team is woken up. It is always interesting to see what the heroes wear to bed. Illyana is the only one in what could be a sexy outfit, which makes sense.
Warlock is upset that he has angered his friends. Illyana just wants Warlock to get some life experience from the real world and not from televisions.
Warlock doesn’t understand what real life is. People think Illyana is going too far but it had to be said.
Wolfsbane tells Warlock that New York City is pretty real. So he takes off for the big apple.
Spider-Man, in his black costume, is swinging across the city. He comes across some small animals on the street. The poor little critters have pieces of cybernetics sticking out of them. Spider-Man enters the laboratory the animals are coming out of. The Animal Liberation Front are the ones releasing the creatures. Spider-Man knows it isn’t right but sticking machinery into little animals, isn’t right either.
Warlock has taken the form of David Letterman and attracting lots of attention, so he changes to another person.
Spider-Man has a ASPCA Representative tell him that the lab has to be shut down. The wires sticking out of the animals are hurting them in a way. Warlock sees Spider-Man and goes into a toy store. People think he is a toy and he makes friend with a scientist. He takes him home, where we learn that his wife is also a scientist. Warlock gives up a piece of his skin for examination purposes. Something happens and Warlock gets supercharged by energy.
Spider-Man is still swinging around. He hears giant steps and swings around a corner. Godlock, Warlock as Godzilla, is stomping around, holding the lady doctor. Spider-Man tries to move Warlock in a safer direction.
There is a subplot dealing with the business of Peter having to set up his camera to take pictures.
Warlock’s main personality is slowly coming through. Then he turns into King Kong. So naturally, he starts climbing a building. King Konglock. That isn’t clever at all.
Warlock turns into a rocket and blasts himself off into the sky. It was the only way to get rid of all that excess energy. Don’t worry, Warlock comes back to the ground as a giant black puddle of goo. He’s okay.
That night, the New Mutants welcome Warlock back to the mansion. Warlock has decided to turn into a human shape and will attempt to dream, which is what caused all of this in the first place. He wants to dream and New York City is where dreams come true.
Not a a bad issue. It feels more like an extra length Marvel Team-Up with Warlock issue.
At 1,072 views – our most popular post has been; Big Brother 16 : Wednesday – July 9, 2014
At 317 views – our most popular comic review has been; Death of Wolverine 3
Which, again, is the reason why I’m all for turning this blog into a Big Brother blog, as Big Brother related posts make up four of my top five posts.
Best Ever Single Day View : 275 – July 24, 2014.
Best Month : November 2014, with 732 views.
Another item I am quite proud of, and will post about it again once it happens – we are a mere 300 views away from beating last year’s number of views! That is outstanding! Which really, is all about the visitors to the blog that makes that possible so thank you again.
. . .
What I’m most proud of, and you have already seen it before you saw this, is the new theme! We went from the retired Vostok to Parament, and I couldn’t be happier! There may be some slight edits as the transition moves but I’ve been really wanting a right side bar for the longest time. After one of the nice WordPress team members assured me that I wouldn’t lose all of my information or weird formatting issues wouldn’t happened, I’ve been just waiting for this day to bring the new site online.
At first, I didn’t care for the Orange aspects, but it is growing on me.
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Come back tomorrow for the beginning of our . . . Ant-Man Celebration!!! It isn’t that many posts, so calling it an Event Month, doesn’t feel right.
Brian comments on a double page spread that is a clear homage to Uncanny X-Men 141,with the giant wall of slain or captured X-Men. The podcast covers Second Coming, Chapters 8 – 11. The review for 525 starts at 1:12:14 and ends at 1:15:21.
So I quickly checked to make sure I owned the issue, and sadly, I didn’t so I quickly went to my online list of comics I’m hoping to sell to Lonestar Comics and it wasn’t on that list. Luckily, Hastings had a copy of it and now I own this again.
Previously, and this is nearly a solid page of a recap but I feel like it is pretty necessary as this is part ten of fourteen. Hope and Cable are back from the future. Bastion has been prepared for this day and has started an all out war on the X-Men. The teleporters have been taken out as has the X-Jets. Utopia and the surrounding area of San Francisco, are stuck in a pink bubble. A team of X-Men are locating the energy source of the bubble and it turns out it is a portal to a possible future – of course. Nimrods come out and the X-Men win this battle but some take severe injury. Cyclops sends X-Force, Cable and Doug into the future to stop the onslaught of Nimrods. Cable has given Hope a final goodbye.
Onto the issue!
Issue opens with Hope yelling at Cyclops as he just sent her father off to die in a suicide mission. The worst thing about this is that, mentally, poor Scott is having to quietly deal with the fact that he sent his son, Cable, on a suicide mission. As she is yelling at him, her eyes start to glow red, so this may be the first sign that Hope’s mutant power is power mimicry.
There is an ad for the Honda Insight, so go out and buy one of those!
The Dome. San Francisco, CA. The Fantastic Four arrive and I do enjoy seeing the Dodsons take on Marvel’s First Family. Referring to the art, as much as I enjoy the Dodsons on art – and I do – but the trade for this crossover must read like it is all over the place with how every three issues, the art is more in a clean cartoony style. The other artists have a more . . . realistic, isn’t the right word but it works for this point.
Speaking of my history with Second Coming, this storyline came out while Kitty was stuck in the space bullet so I got this due to Magik having various appearances in the story, which was great to see her having a larger role in a major crossover. Of course, she spent most of her time as a prisoner in Limbo – so my issues are scattered.
I own Chapters 1, 2, 3, 5, 6, 7, 10 and the Second Coming Prepare (two New Mutants issues, all three Uncanny X-Men issues, one X-Force issue, no X-Men Legacy issues – X-Factor was barely involved in this crossover). I don’t own the Blind Science one shot but do own all three issues of Hellbound, that deals with Magik’s capture and eventful escape. Of the bookend issues of the crossover, I only own the first issue of it. Now that I have it written out, that isn’t to bad – I guess it goes to show that it starts off very strong and I missed out on the last four issues.
The Fantastic Four meet up with Thor, Iron Man and Bucky Cap. Iron Man isn’t sure what the Dome is made out of. Doctor Nemesis arrives with his fellow X-Club, minus his trademark hat and mask – which I miss. Nemesis doesn’t hide the fact that there is a genocide occurring inside of the dome. Bucky Cap addresses the situation and takes charge. He sends the brains, and I like how he makes a point of calling them Doctors Nemesis and Richards and has to address Stark separately. That guy needs to get his doctorate. For Thing and Thor, he tells them to keep hitting the dome, to see if it does have a weakness.
Utopia. Cyclops is hooked up to Cerebro and Emma is helping him get the message out. He reports that there are five more Nimrods to deal with, one is bad enough but five is high stakes. Cyclops ends with stating that they are on their home turf, so they have to start fighting like it. Which really, how smart was it to set the entire mutant race (or the bulk of it) in one specific and very public place.
Chinatown. Storm and Surge are trying to save civilians. Storm can’t make it rain inside of the dome but she does have her lightening powers. Psylocke and Fantomex are inside a building. Fantomex takes the time to make the famous Watchmen quote “I’m not trapped in here with you, you’re trapped in here with me” which maybe appears elsewhere before Alan Moore wrote it. Fantomex comments on it being a stupid movie – for some reason. Namor is holding his own against several Nimrods but requests help as five more just arrived.
In the Future. X-Force plus Doug and Cable – see a future that is overrun with Sentinels. Doug notices something to his right.
If finally dawns on Archangel that this future, the mutant race is nothing more than an ugly nightmare. How great is it to see a massive wall homage of Uncanny X-Men 141’s cover?
Marvel Database is under the impression that Magik is the one that is below Havok, middle of Beast and Cable and above Professor Xavier. Which is enough for me to seek this issue out. If not, Second Coming would have ended with Chapter Seven.
Archangel is starting to lose his mind and Wolverine tries to keep him calm. X23 is motivated by seeing that she is dead in this future and decides that everyone must die.
There is an ad for Ultimate X, which I own the first issue.
I like how Doug got an X-Force black and gray costume, that’s a nice touch.
Wolverine thinks that, since they are all dead, the future fools wouldn’t know how to fight them. X-Force makes short work of the first wave of robots that are manned by humans. Doug comments that all of the heavy duty machines are being sent to the present, so that’s why they shouldn’t have to worry about heavy artillery.
Cable wants everyone to commit to killing everyone that they come across until they are done with the situation.
Present Day. Xavier, someone remembered to dust him off, confronts Cyclops – he never wanted Scott to have to deal with stuff like this. Xavier wants to help and Cyclops tells him to work with Legion, his son. Which is pretty rich Scott telling Xavier to spend time with his son as he is off sending his own son off to die.
Cyclops sends Rogue off to work with Hope, as Rogue was one of the first people to meet Hope. In fact, Mystique forced a baby Hope’s head against Rogue’s sleeping lips and this cured Rogue of having all of the memories of The Children – the characters from Mike Carey’s opening storyline of his X-MEN run (that became Legacy). Supernovas, was the name of the storyline. Rogue crosses her heart, which is under her very open shirt with the zipper nearly down all the way down. Oh Rogue, get it together! Also, why so many Xs on her shirt?
Outside of the Dome. Thor and Thing are giving the dome all that they have. Reed tells them to stop, it has only gone down by 15 percent. Iron Man states that they are one day away from getting inside. Doctor Nemesis states that everyone inside will be dead within hours which is how we end the issue.
